Happy Birthday, River.

11:25:00 PM

Right off the bat, this entry was a weird one for me to write. I don't usually pinpoint a specific person to write about most days - generally just ideas, thoughts, fashion, etc. but it wasn't a question that this was just as important to me. Today would've been River Phoenix's 45th birthday, but of course, cut short in the early hours of Halloween in 1993. He was 23. I don't like talking about his death. You could google it and find out a play-by-play of what happened that night, but today isn't about that, therefore, I won't be going into it too much.

I'd spend countless hours and hours into the early morning watching interviews/biographical movies/documentaries, trying to learn everything about River. I'd never found (still to this day) anyone who has been more intriguing than him. I used to say I didn't know what it was.. I'd tell one of my closest friends, "you know... there's just something about River. There's something different about him." Ask me at any given time and now, in a heartbeat I'd say:

His generosity. The illusive, peculiar, Vegan kid. He was kind-hearted, enthusiastic; he was passionate.

All of which this generation is lacking.

River was born to a couple hippie parents in Oregon, raised in a radical cult, fled to Puerto Rico at the age of four, only knew how to speak Spanish, never had any formal education - therefore, couldn't read or write. It was all too interesting to me. A story that really intrigued me was when he and his then girlfriend, Martha Plimpton, went on a dinner date in Manhattan to an upscale restaurant. When she ordered soft shell crabs, he left the restaurant, in tears, strolling along Park Avenue. Martha chased after him and he looked at her and said, "I love you so much, why?" She later said in an interview: "I loved him for that, for his dramatic desire that we share every belief, that I be with him all the way."

I had a short chat with my mom today and something that popped up was our similar thought that those who pass young have lived, in a sense, a full life in the fast lane. Without a doubt in my mind, River did that. He worked closely with PETA, went to environmental rallies and fundraisers, and raised awareness for anything he felt passionate about. He would give his time to speak at ecological conventions about green issues regarding the environment - things that I, too, find interest in.

A quote of his was quite interesting to me when I heard it:

“I try to lie as much as I can when I’m interviewed. It’s reverse psychology. I figure if you lie, they’ll print the truth.”

It had me thinking a lot.

It bothers me that I haven't even articulated everything I've wanted to. I have so much else to say, but no other words to put it. There's too much about him that I won't even begin to touch on. It's endless, really. It was just on my mind today. If there's anything to learn from the short life of River Phoenix, it's to remain solid in the beliefs you have and let your passion drive you far ahead. I've said it again and again on each anniversary - River Jude, today is your day. You aren't here anymore, but your legacy lives on. I look for you in everyone. 23 years ad infinitum.