AM I PRETTY?
11:38:00 AM
This video was something that pulled a chord somewhere in me that stayed long enough to linger for the entire week. Today marks the 1st year anniversary of the release of 'AMERICAN CANDY' by The Maine; I recall this song as being the first one to really catch my attention, it was the one song I immediately called a favourite -- upbeat, a catchy guitar riff, assertive lyrics.. etc. A year later, I'm still convinced it's one of the strongest songs on the record.. yet, also one of the more overlooked, underrated tracks.
I woke up this morning (like any other), walked straight to the washroom and bestowed in front of me was a mirror and my reflection staring me back in the face. Without makeup. Uneven skin tone. Hair in knots. Lanky arms. Weird bone structure. Retainer in place. Scar on my left eyebrow. Tired eyes. This is my normal; nowhere near perfect. As an aspiring ballerina, I've spent most of my life stationed in front of a mirror, critiquing every single pirouette/grande jeté/pas de chat.. etc. Along with the technical critique, physical criticism doesn't fall far either. Dancers are long and lanky (as mentioned in the music video). I am not long and lanky (except my abnormally long arms). I'm not tall enough. My left leg is shorter than my right; making my right hip noticeably much higher than the left. My flexibility isn't near as good as it should be. My legs aren't toned enough. I'm not as skinny as the next girl. My features aren't that of the classic ballerina.
As I grew a little older and a little more conscious of my thought process, I realized that all of these things are what makes me, well... me. These "flaws" aren't necessarily negative when we realize that they make us up to be who we are; uniquely and beautifully crafted. Yet, I am not any more special than the next person, or even any less, but I am the best 'me' this world will ever see. It's all I'm able to control. The same can be said for you.
As I grew a little older and a little more conscious of my thought process, I realized that all of these things are what makes me, well... me. These "flaws" aren't necessarily negative when we realize that they make us up to be who we are; uniquely and beautifully crafted. Yet, I am not any more special than the next person, or even any less, but I am the best 'me' this world will ever see. It's all I'm able to control. The same can be said for you.
Not pretty.
I don't want "pretty". I want strong; full of dignity and embodied by compassion. I want intelligent; loved for the brains in my head and admired for its use. I want fearless; unafraid of the unknown, but afraid of how much I do not fear. I want passionate; I want to be it fully. I want all of these things before just "pretty". Not pretty. No -- you are not just pretty. You are so much more than just a word based on a societal norm. You don't even need to hear it from me because you already have it inside of you. Of course, sometimes we just need to be reminded.
I don't want "pretty". I want strong; full of dignity and embodied by compassion. I want intelligent; loved for the brains in my head and admired for its use. I want fearless; unafraid of the unknown, but afraid of how much I do not fear. I want passionate; I want to be it fully. I want all of these things before just "pretty". Not pretty. No -- you are not just pretty. You are so much more than just a word based on a societal norm. You don't even need to hear it from me because you already have it inside of you. Of course, sometimes we just need to be reminded.
But by chance, in case you needed to hear it from someone else today -- you are so beautiful and so worthy; more beautiful than the millions of stars/galaxies/planets. Take care of yourself. You are all you have. There is no one like you.
"THERE'S BEAUTY AND GRACE IN THE FLAWS OF YOUR FACE;
ALL CANDOR AND STYLE IN THE CROOK OF YOUR SMILE."
x lj
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